Welcome to America!

Our interview was yesterday and now I join John Lennon (and many other non-Beatles) in becoming a Permanent Resident of the U.S. of America. Lynnette and I were in Detroit yesterday afternoon for our interview for Immigration. We passed. Yipee!! Anyways, now I am officially a Permanent Resident. This means I can work anywhere I want, and stay here as long as I want (I have to reapply every 10 years or so for a new card, but other than that I'm good to go). Not being able to vote is about the only difference between permanent residence and Citizenship. The interview was rather uneventful. He believed we were really married right away and barely asked any questions. The question that did get my attention, though, was "Have you ever tortured anyone?" I guess they have to ask, but it was a little weird. Well, that's about it. I would like to thank the acadamy, and my agent, and everyone else that made this day possible.

The Newlywed Game:Green Card Edition

So I'm going in next Monday for an interview with a Homeland Security Officer to determine whether or not I will recieve my Work Authorization Permit (aka a "green card" since the card you recieved used to be green). I was thinking about this process and what kinds of questions they may ask Lynnette and I. You see the questions are for a few reasons, to see if our marriage is legitimate, if we will be able to support ourselves, and to see if I'm a threat to National Security. These are all good things to know of course. I just thought it would be funny if they did the questioning like a game show. You could have 3 couples come in: Lynnette and Me, some dude that ordered a Russian Bride off the internet, and a Mexican couple. It would be great. We could write down our answers on a piece of paper and if they matched our spouses we got point. And the winning couple would get the Green Card. You wouldn't even have to ask the regular INS questions like "Are you a member of Al Queda?" instead you could ask Newlywed Game questions like "If your spouse was an appliance, what appliance would they be?". Y'know how on the show the couples would get mad at each other when they got a question wrong and the woman would end up hitting her husband with the answer card. Image how mad the couples would get when if you loose you immediately get sent out of the country. When a couple gets disqualified a Homeland Security Officer would come in with a machine gun and drag the spouse that isn't American away. It would be awesome (well maybe it wouldn't, but I know people would watch).

Anyways, maybe it's best that I'm not in charge of Homeland Security. I'm excited to take the interview. I'm a little nervous, but I've heard it's not that bad. Anyways, I'll let you know Tuesday how it goes.

The Pretender

People keep asking me how we're doing and what we're up to now. So this post is about that. Lynnette is working at Curves for Women and Ruby Tuesday as a waitress. I am guest teaching in the Midland Public School system. We're sending out resumes and figuring out what God has next for us. If you're praying for us, keep it up. Please pray for encouragment and direction, Thanks. Anyways, as for what I'm up to.

The life of a substitute teacher is quite interesting to me actually. I feel like I take on the personality of the teacher that I am subbing for every time I enter a classroom. Today for example I am an Art teacher. I get to be creative and help students make works of art (by Art I mean those peices your mom used to hang on the fridge). Other days I may be a Math teacher or a Kindergarten teacher or even a gym teacher.

There used to be a show on television called "The Pretender" where this guy Jerod was a super genius and he would "pretend" to be other people. He would be a Doctor or a Lawyer or a Garbage man even. Y'know solve a mystery in 60 minutes and make the bad guys pay. It was a great show. In my own small way that's what I feel like every day. I get to "pretend" to be other people. It's quite fun actually. I'm not saying I'm a genius (maybe I am maybe I'm not) I'm just saying it's kind of cool to be something totally different everyday. I don't get to solve mysteries either, but who knows tomorrow is another day. Today Art tomorrow Kindergarten, Friday solve mystery. Not bad.

A couple of observations about subsitute teaching:

1. It's really not that bad. I thought this would be payback for all the subs that I was mean to over the years, but it's not. For the most part the classes I get treat me pretty well. And if they don't I just don't come back, it's great. If I have a class that is totally terrible, I simple don't accept positions at that placement anymore. It's like starting a job and feeling free to quit any time I want. FANTASTIC!!! Plus I get $10/hr. not the best but at least it's not minimum wage.

2. Subs don't care. I used to think that I ruined the days of the subs that taught me when I was "less than an angel". But the truth is the subs don't care. At least I don't. If a student doesn't want to do their work. I don't care. If they want to goof around and distract others. I don't care. It's not like it's causing me bodily harm. I'm not their regular teacher. I had a High School Math class the other day and they had a test. This one kid sat there sleeping and didn't write a thing on his test. I think he was a Senior on his second time in Algebra I. Did I care. Of course not. I felt bad for the kid. But if he wants to flunk out of High School that's his business. Hey $10/hr is not enough to care. Caring starts at $20. he he... Sorry if I sound mean.

3. It's the easiest/best part of teaching. When I was in school the part I liked the least was writing lesson plans. I liked teaching the lessons alright. It's just the writing out of everything we were to do was time consuming and boring. Now I don't have to do that. I show up and the lesson is there I teach it. I go home. If there's a student teacher even better. I just sit there and get paid. Wicked awesome. Plus a lot of Elementary Teachers plan an extra recess when there's a sub. Recess is the best. I think life would be better if all jobs had recess. I mean. You stop what you're doing and you go and trow a football around, or swing, or play hop scotch. Think about your job, wouldn't it be better if you had recess twice a day?

4. Time off anytime I want. Yeah I don't get paid when I don't work. But I can go anywhere and do anything I want. At the end of the month I'm going to California to work for my good friend Dwayne. We're doing some yard work. Kind of ironic that two Canadians will be doing yard work in California since a lot of workers in Cali come from across the other U.S. Border.

Well, that's about it for me. Oh yeah, on the 20th of March we're going for my Green Card interview. I'm calling it the "Newlywed Game: Greencard Edition", but I'll write more about that later. Rock on.

_dave